Same Old Feelings
by mitcivnoihsaf
Summary: Takes place after TOW The Chick and The Duck. Old feelings arise while a new guy my complicate some things. RnR
1. Default Chapter

For anyone who was reading moving forward sorry I never finished it, I do plan on it someday, its just eh I got bored and had this huge writers block. Hope youll like this one.

It takes place in season 3 and picks up right after Ross walks out the door in TOW The Chick and The Duck.

**Same old Feelings**

Chapter 1

'Dr. Gellar'

"See ya" The words seemed to echo about one hundred times in Rachel's mind. She couldn't get over what Ross had done for her, let along begin to imagine just why he had done it.

"He gave up the chance to be on TV- talking about dinosaurs none the less to stay here and help me" Rachel had begun to forget about how sweet and caring Ross really was, considering his behavior during last few weeks before they broke up.

He was misunderstanding and jealous. Plus he thought that she would actually cheat on him with Mark. He didn't trust her, and that upset Rachel. But maybe…maybe the reason he acted the way he did was because he loved her so much.

For a second there when Ross was leaving her apartment Rachel had this sudden urge to just run up into his arms, and kiss him- she would give anything for him to wrap his arms around her like he use to. Tonight was a sure reminder of how good it felt to be pampered by Ross- even if it was just a sympathy thing. No Ross assuredly didn't care about her, like he use to…they were just friends after all right? And Obviously them as a couple wasn't right…they made each other miserable- as only the way two people who loved each other so deeply could. No…nothing could ever happen again…

…Ever? No. No Rachel didn't like the sound of that. Even still Rachel had wondered what just would have happened if she had gone through with it…would he except her…was it what she really wanted? Rachel eyed the door…she wasn't going to let him get away this time…

Chandler looked up for where he had been staring at the duck and noticed Ross sit down on the step outside of the two apartments.

"What did you do" Chandler asked trying to ease the situation. Obviously something had gone on with Rachel. What else could it be?

Ross looked down at the ground and let out a small frustrated laugh and shook his head. "I did something terrible Chandler. I lost the best thing in my life…"

Chandler sighed, he couldn't believe he had arrived back to the same conversation he had with Ross right after their break up. "Look man, there is nothing you could do. I mean you were on a break right? You need to move on. If Joey were here Id say we would go out to a strip club and get you good an drunk." Chandler never was great at advice.

"Isn't that how this all happened in the first place?" Ross had asked his friend. His stupid drunken mistake. " Its just….If I didn't think we were broken up I wouldn't have gone with you in the first place…." Ross paused. "I just don't know what to do anymore…"

"-About what?" came a voice from the door."

Ross and Chandler both looked up to see Rachel standing there.

"His-His…Rash…" Chandler blurted out with Ross shooting him a look.

Rachel wrinkled his nose. "Oh?" She asked confused. "I didn't know you had skin problems."

"Well not him…his-his…this guy at work, Ross thinks he's going to get the rash…its jus this big mess of …spreading skin disorders" Chandler looked down at the ground…a rash? What was he thinking.

"What?" Rachel asked equally as confused at before.

"Oh will you look at the time….I have to get this little one to bed" Chandler said pointing to the duck. "Lets go buddy…" After picking up the bird Chandler fled into his apartment.

"What was that about?" Rachel asked Ross with an uncomfortable laugh.

"That." Ross paused. "You know Chandler Rach…hes got this- well this thing going on now that you know he doesn't want to talk to you girls about so I guess well to cover that all up now I have some type of rash." Ross said laughing in an uneasy manner as well."-So what's up?"

"Oh you know…I was just thinking" Rachel, holding her side, walked over to where Ross was sitting and attempted to take a seat next to him" "Ow!…Oh God…" Rachel yelled at she grabbed onto her side and tried to straighten herself out again.

Ross jumped up and gently placed his arm around her in an attempt to make her comfortable once again. What he really didn't realize was, she was growing more and more uncomfortable by the minute. "Why don't we just stand instead" he said smiling.

Rachel smiled at him " Thanks". That voice that she had heard before was growing stronger leaving her with now choice. She began eyeing up his lips, still remembering what he tasted like the last time she kissed him…it was the morning after…the morning after he had done it…ruined their relationship forever. As she started to lean into him ready to once again taste his lips, she got a hold of herself and really realized what she was doing. In order to cover up her actions she let her body go limp and lost her balance.

"Oh my god Rach! Are you okay?" Ross yelled, genuinely concerned, helped her to her feet.

Wheezing Rachel replied "Yeah…Ah, Yeah Im fine Ross." So eager to hide what her real intentions were Rachel hadn't given a though as to how much that might hurt her already aching ribs.

Helping her into her apartment, concerned as ever Ross offered "Are you sure you dot want me to stay here with you tonight- I mean at least until Monica gets home" The truth was Ross whole heartedly hoped that Rachel would accept his off. He had missed protecting her and babying her like he use to.

"Oka- No No, Ill be fine really Ross" Rachel stopped herself, as much as she would love to spend her night with Ross, she couldn't let herself be humiliated by the inevitable fact that she would do something stupid around Ross. Pain killers, hormones and a sudden longing for her ex boyfriend would be sure to create an interesting night. "Besides I have an early meeting I need to go to in the morning so Im probably just going to jump in bed anyway."

Ross threw her a look. "You can't be serious, you cant go in your state. I know how much you hate those things anyway."

Rachel smiled at him, loving the fact that he knew her so well. "Ugh I know I know…but I don't think Sophie is going to want to hear about, let alone believe that I have a broken rib, since she knows I hate going anyway…she's defiantly going to think its some stupid line to get me out of it."

"Okay well what if your doctor called your office and explained the situation to them" Ross smiled, up to something.

"my Doctor huh?" Rachel question flirtatiously hitting his arm.

"Okay Okay, well not your direct doctor but the doctor you saw last night."

"Go on…" Rachel laughed.

"Okay so what if Dr. Gellar called and told them all about how you were bedridden, and unable to come into work…"

"I say Dr. Gellar's got himself a new patient" they both laughed, which soon turned into another one of their famous stares. Clearing her throat Rachel spoke up "Well thanks Ross… for everything tonight."

Ross leaned in and kissed her on the cheek, making Rachel crazy on the inside, he then reached for her hand. "Anytime Rach, and if you need anything, anything at all tonight, just call me- I mean that." Looking down and realizing he was still holding onto her hand he abruptly dropped it. "Okay so, don't bother getting up tomorrow…I have it all under control."

Ross gave her one last smiled and walked out the door. Rachel was left staring at the door for minutes after. She didn't know what was going on with her, suddenly she was feeling all of these things she thought had gone away…and had no idea what to do about them. One thing was for sure though…she had to figure it out…and fast.

Hope you like it, I have a lot of ideas for this story right now which is always good.

Please Read and Review


	2. Date With Mrs Green

Thanks for reviewing guys Ill try and update Moving Forward sometime, theres so much i forgot about it so Ill have to sit down and read it again.

Hope you enjoy this

Chapter 2

A Date With Mrs. Green

Rachel lifted her head up slowly she had woken up to the sound of a phone ringing. Glancing over to the clock she saw that it was just about noon. She then groggily reached for the cordless phone that was next to her on the bed, wincing in pain as she made a sudden turn. "Damn ribs." she mumbled.

"Hello" Rachel said as she laid her head back down on the pillow this time with the phone.

"Rachel darling, I heard about your little accident, how are you?"

It was her Mother. Why the hell was she calling there.

"Mom? Im- wait how did you find out?" Rachel questioned in a high pitched voice.

"Well dear, I called your work to set up a little dinner date and they told me you were home, and well here I am calling you. Now you just keep resting dear and Ill be right over" Sandra explained

Rachel jumped to an upright position in bed, not evening thinking about her side. "OW! What…what do you mean youll be right over?"

"Well for lunch dear, I wanted to talk to you, youll never guess whose son is coming back into town." At this Rachel rolled her eyes, ever since she and Ross had broken up her Mother was always trying to set her up with some guy who was 'worthy of her daughter' "Now Ill be over in a little while, Ill have the help make us sandwiches or something to bring over."

With that Sandra was gone. Great. Rachel thought….now I have to deal with her for the day. It wasn't that Rachel didn't like her Mother she just wasn't in the mood to hear about this new rich guy that her Mother had picked out for her.

After it seemed like it took her forever to get ready Rachel came out of her room. Dressed in a plaid skirt that sat just above her knees and a white long sleeved tee, with her hair messily pulled up, it was a much effort she could put into an outfit with the state she was in…even if it was for her mother.

As she took a seat at the kitchen table and took her medicine Monica walked in the door.

"Hey Rach, how are you feeling?"

"How does it look like Im feeling?" Rachel shot back frustrated.

"Okay Okay Fine." Monica walked past her and was heading to her room. "Bitch" she mumbled.

Hearing this Rachel slowly stood up. "Mon, wait. Im just…UGH Im so stressed. I mean I can barely move…and my Mom is coming for lunch."

"Still bothering you huh? Ross told me about last night."

Smiling "Ross was here earlier?"

"Yeah he came by to see how you were but you were still asleep, said he would drop by later. I don't know…" Monica stopped realizing the second part of Rachel's complaints "You Mothers coming!"

"Unfortunately" Rachel said sighing.

"Great…and this is the day I choose to come home for lunch…just great. She's almost as bad as my Mothe- Mrs. Green! How are you!" Monica said cheerfully noticing Sandra's presence, as she ran over to hug her. "Its been a while hasn't it?"

"Yes…Yes I suppose it has…I hope you don't mind I let myself in…" Sandra looked around the apartment "You really should keep these doors locked in this neighborhood anyway…"

Monica looked at her watch. "Ugh will you look at the time, I need to be back at the restaurant…too bad I have to cut this visit short."

Rachel shot her a look. "Mon, you sure? I mean you didn't even get to eat yet."

"Yeah Im real sorry Rach, Chicken fiasco or something- nice seeing you again Mrs. Green…" Monica grabbed her coat from the rack and run out the door.

Sandra watched her leave and turned to Rach "She always has been such a weird girl…"

Rachel smiled.

"Anyway dear…how are you, tell me everything" Sandra said while placing a bag on the table, and taking out two wrapped sandwiches. "How did this all happen-I brought us some food now sit down."

"Thanks Mom" Rachel replied while taking a seat. "Well I mean, it all started when Mon was trying out roller skates, you know for work, and Phoebe and I were trying to help her then I got distracted and she knocked me down. And then ever since then I was having this terrible, really horrible pain in my side, then last night Ross took me to the hospital and we found out about my rib."

Sandra laughed

"What's so funny?" Rachel asked taking a bite of the sandwich her mother had brought.

"Nothing…for a second there I thought you said you went with that Ross boy." Once again Sandra let out and exaggerated laugh.

Rachel stared at her "Well I did Mom…"

"What! I thought you two were done…messing around. You remember what I told you about cheaters Rachel." Sandra said scolding her daughter.

"I know mom. But first off….Ross and I aren't back together…and second…'messing around'? We were never messing around." Rachel said offended.

"Well come on Rachel dear…surly you didn't see a future with that dinosaur boy. And if you two aren't together then why would you go with him."

"I cant believe you, Ross is a really great guy Mom. Besides…he was here and pretty much insisted I go and see a doctor, I was having trouble walking on my own." Rachel smiled "I felt so bad though, he missed his chance to be on the discovery channel to help me."

"Who watches the discovery channel anyway…no loss there" Sandra said with a laugh.

"I do!" Rachel yelled.

"Rachel please…" Sandra laughed.

"Okay…well I mean I have. Ross and I use to watch it at night…after we…after we um- well you see we would switch I mean some nights after-" Rachel cleared her throat " some night after we had done it, we would lay there…and he would just hold me and we use to watch the discovery channel together…we would switch back and forth between that and E! . Rachel seemed to get lost in what she was saying…and Sandra noticed this.

"While that is a lovely story dear…that's all it is now, just a story. And it will remain forever that way because that boy cheated on you." Sandra said trying to reason with her daughter.

Rachel looked down and her voice became soft. "I know…its just…last night, the way that he just took care of me." Rachel paused "I missed it mom."

Sandra looked at her daughter and for the first time noticed just how much pain she was in. " I know honey, but you really have to move on, he was just being a friend…anyway you know Sally's son, Matthew the um lawyer, well he's opening up a practice in the city, so I gave him your number, I figured he would be lonely and you could show him around. Maybe youll like him. Blonde hair….nice smile…tall…give it a shot Rachel."

Maybe her Mom was right, she couldn't stay hung up over Ross forever. Its not like she hadn't gone out on a date since the break up…plenty of them….its just now…after last night, she didn't know what she wanted anymore. "No reason I can't show him around" Rachel faked a smile in order to please her Mother.

"Im only asking for you to give him a shot dear, that's all." Sandra said and she placed her hand on Rachel's cheek. "I just want to see you happy again."

Rachel nodded and looked down. The phone began to ring and Rachel started to stand up and get up, when Sandra shook her head.

"Ill get it dear you just rest." Walking over to the phone she picked it up. "Monica and Rachel's…"

Rachel couldn't help but let out a laugh by the way her mother had picked up the phone.

"Oh, Hello Ross. " Rachel whipped her head around to where he mother was standing next to the couch. "Yeah Rachel's here." Sandra answered but made no attempt to hand the phone to her.

"Well can I speak to her." Ross pleaded on the other line.

"Why?" Sandra asked smugly.

"Because I want to know if she's alright." Ross said getting angry.

"Well you know, shell manage."

"San-Mrs. Green, would you please give the phone to Rachel."

"Ugh" Sandra made a disgusted noise and brought the phone over to Rachel, not bothering to cover the speaker she said " That Boy wants to waste some of your time." in only the way that Sandra could.

"Give it to me" Rachel said through gritted teeth.

"Ill have Matthew give you a call…now I better get going…feel better dear." Mrs. Green said as she made her way out the door.

Sighing Rachel lifted the phone up to her ear. "Still there Ross?"

"Yeah, so how are you?" Ross questioned, he couldn't help but wonder who this 'Matthew' was.

"Oh Im a little bit better than last night I guess, once again thanks for everything Ross."

"Yeah, I mean what are friends for right? Say Rach, who is Matthew?" Ross asked.

"Ugh just some guy my Mother wants to set me up with…she says she just wants to see me happy again." Rachel said while shrugging and walking over to take a seat on the couch.

"Oh…Oh…okay, and would that make you, uh you know happy?" Ross questioned getting jealous.

"Who knows anymore" Rachel said with a small laugh. The truth was though…she didn't even know "Hm. Why do you ask."

I do. I know what makes you happy Ross thought "Oh you know just wondering, I was just wondering if you want some company tonight, since you really cant go anywhere."

"Um. Yeah…Yeah okay that'll be fun." …More like awkward Rachel thought. "But you know Ross that's the other line, I think its Mon, so Ill talk to you later."

"bye Rach, see you tonight." Ross said while hanging up.

He didn't like the sound of this….this Matthew. Hes probably some rich boy that her mother loves Ross thought to himself. I know what makes you happy Rach…I know. Looking at the stars, Lilies, walks in central park in the middle of the night. He smiled he had remembered this one night in the summer, it had just rained and it had to be like 1 am, they were lying in his bed just holding each other when she had suggested it. They had gone walking in their bare feet in the grass holding hands and laughing under the stars. It was things like that Ross missed. For appearing as such a materialistic girl…it was times like that when she was happiest…and Ross knew it.

And you….you make me happy.

"Ugh. " Ross let out a yell as he put his head down on the desk he was sitting at. Life was so confusing…and this…all this with Rachel couldn't be happening again.

Could It?

Hope you liked it please review.


	3. If she could learn to forgive

I got this up tonight for everyone who has been reviewing…which means a lot to me.

- diehardRRfan I know what you mean about the whole JnR thing, right after I finished season 9 is when I started writing this because I needed to be in an RnR mood lol.

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Rachel took one last look in the mirror, after she had changed into a pair of jeans and a white blouse. Her hair was no longer messily thrown up, but instead pulled up in some sort of twist with a few stray hairs hanging to frame her face.

'Not bad' she thought to herself. A relaxed look that should have taken her a matter of minutes took hours, after all she was taking it slow and didn't want anything to further damage her ribs again.

As she walked out of her bedroom holding onto her side slightly for comfort she saw Monica at the stove making something for dinner, hearing foot steps she turned around.

"Well someone looks like she feels better" Monica laughed.

"Ha Ha" said Rachel smugly. " Yeah whatever they gave me has been helping pretty well...I just...you know didn't want to sit around looking like a slob like I did earlier."

" Rachel, that outfit that you had on before...honey you do realize you use to go to work in that, you didn't look like a slob." Monica said wondering what Rachel was up to.

Rachel cleared her throat " Well I mean I just wanted to look...you know a little more put together, we are having company tonight for dinner...which reminds me, how do you cook all day long...come home and cook dinner, and not get sick of it."

" Do you get sick of clothes?" Monica questioned.

"Uh No!" Rachel shot back

"Well then...anyway its just Ross coming for dinner..."

"And he's just as good as anyone else, so I should look nice."

"Rachel. Its Ross...you could come out here wearing a bag, and he of all people wouldn't care." Monica said as she began putting the spaghetti she had just made into two bowls. "Its just going to be you two tonight anyway, Pete and I are going out for dinner."

"You-You mean your not going to be here tonight?" Rachel questioned stuttering. 'Come one Rach, get a hold of yourself youve been alone with him plenty of times before...no big deal' she told herself.

"Yeah Im not sure where we're going...but I think he said something Italian...or was it Mexican...oh I don't know" Monica replied trailing off

Rachel rolled her eyes "Hm. So how are things going with you two anyway?"

Monica made a face and shook her head. "I don't know, I mean I like him...but I just I don't feel that spark- that spark that just tells you this could be amazing! You know what I mean right?"

"Yes...that's how I knew Ross and I were headed somewhere good..." Rachel smiled, noticing Monica's face Rachel stopped smiling and decided it was time to refocus. "So...what are you going to do."

"Im not really sure yet" Monica said putting on her coat. " He'll be here soon though" As if on cue the buzzer at the door went off. " I guess Ill just stick with it for a while and see what happens."

Rachel nodded. As much as her own love life was a mess right now, she still felt for Monica, she really deserved someone special. She just hoped her friend would find that 'spark' soon...She wondered if Monica had still thought about Richard...and if she did...did she still feel the spark, like she did with Ross.

Just as Monica was about to open the door to go and meet Pete Rachel spoke up "Hey Mon?"

"Yeah Rach?"

"Um. When you get home...lets talk okay?" Rachel said with a forced smile.

Monica nodded and was out the door.

"Great nothing left to do but sit here and wait" Rachel sighed and sat on the couch.

Last night had been one of the hardest nights of her life. Did she still have feelings for Ross? She spent the whole night trying to figure that out, and came to one simple conclusion. She didn't know. It was all so complicated, she spend hours reading through little notes he had written her, looking through her box of memories with him, and just reminiscing about the past.

She remembered one conversation in particular.

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"God I can't believe hes getting so big" Rachel said as she took a seat next to Ross on his couch, laying her head on his shoulder.

" I know and hes almost one now." Ross smiled, over the past few weeks, Rachel had grown to become really good around Ben, and couldn't seem to get enough of him lately. "He's so smart too"

"Just like his daddy" Rachel smiled and lifted up her head to give him a soft kiss on the cheek.

Ross let out a small laugh. "The other day when he got here, he walked over and pointed at that picture" Ross pointed at a picture of himself, Rachel, and Ben taken over Monica's a few weeks ago. " looked at me and said ' Mommy?' It was the cutest thing ever." Ross could feel Rachel tense up in his arms, he then looked down at her.

She cleared her throat and replied softly "And Wh-what did you say to Ben?"

"I smiled and said…'Maybe someday' " Rachel had eased up a bit as Ross then planted a small kiss on her lips.

"Rach? Can I ask you something?"

Rachel shifted herself so she was looking directly at Ross." Sure honey."

"God I feel so weird for asking you this…but where are we- I mean were is this going?" Ross said with a serious look on his face, while holding her hand between his.

"What?" Rachel said with a small laugh.

"Rachel, Im serious."

She looked down for a moment and then back up at him. " Well I mean, I don't know…I know that I do love you…and- and what we have is amazing."

Rachel was never good at really talking about her feelings in this way. Before she had met Ross, she had never felt so strongly about someone, and cared for her as deeply as she cared for them, this was all new to her.

"I love you too." Ross said smiling "But I mean whats next?"

Clearing her throat she took a long pause before answering. "Well I don't know, I mean but isn't that what makes it fun you know?"

Ross looked down "Great…good, so all I am is fun to you, that's its?"

Rachel's heart dropped did he really think that's all she saw him as? " Look honey all I know that I have never ever felt this way before in my life, and I never want to give that up."

Ross was looking for anything that would give him some sense of security and Rachel had hoped she was doing that now.

"Youll never have to Rach, Youll never have to. Because I always want to be with you."

Rachel looked at Ross with tears welling in her eyes, she took a deep breath and leaned over kissing him deeply.

As they broke Rachel gave him a small smile. "Me too Ross."

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Rachel wiped a stray tear from her eye as she thought about that moment. "You lied" she said quietly

Just then there was a knock at the door. "Rach!"

It was Ross.

Rachel took a deep breath, and stood up "Just a minute" she yelled back.

Making sure she was fully composed she opened the door for Ross, who looked like he had come straight form work.

"Feel Better?" He asked as he entered the apartment taking his coat off.

"Yeah actually, whatever they gave me, its really been helping." Rachel said as she put the dishes of spaghetti on the table.

"Monica Make this?" Ross asked concerned.

"Mmm hmm why?" Rachel said while sitting down.

"Oh just wondering." Needless to say Ross was relieved that it was his sisters cooking and not Rachel's "So Uh, do you plan on going to work tomorrow…or does Dr. Gellar need to make another phone call?" Ross laughed.

"No thank you doctor, but I think Ill be able to go in tomorrow." Rachel smiled "So how did that go anyway, did they give you a problem?"

"No, everything went fine, though Sophie did refer to you as 'Lucky Bitch' when she realized you weren't going to the meeting." Ross said laughing.

"Yeah- well that's just payback for leaving me with organizing all of the new files the one day when she decided she needed to go home because of" Rachel put in quotes "Minstrel cramps" she laughed while Ross sent her a look,

"Okay, eating here Rach…eating."

"Sorry" Rachel mumbled to herself "Well I thought it was funny." Thinking about her memory from earlier she attempted to change the subject. "So um, hows Ben? He's about to turn two soon right?"

"Yeah, I still cant believe it. Hes doing great though he was asking about you last week." Ross smiled " 'wars wray- shel' " He said impersonating Ben.

"That kid really has a way with words. Its been forever since Ive seen him, maybe you could bring him over sometime next week?" The truth was it she hadn't seen Ben since she and Ross broke up and was really missing him.

"Next week? Yeah, Ill see what Monica's doing so she could see him too. Where is Monica anyway" Ross said the first time he had given her a though since he arrived.

"Oh she's out with Pete" Rachel said while rolling her eyes "Just between you and me I don't know why she's still with him- well I mean besides for the money…which oddly enough she doesn't care about, anyway she was telling me before that she didn't feel 'the spark' so I have no clue what she's doing."

" I don't know, I tend not to get involved anymore with my sisters love life after the whole thing with Richard that was just too weird for me." Ross said making a face.

"Yeah but she really loved him, she was so crushed when they broke up" she paused " I mean don't you remember when we would come back here after a date and she would just be sitting here at this table staring off into space…I felt so horrible showing up with you. Its horrible but I'm almost glad she didn't have a boyfriend when we broke up, it just would have been so hard."

Rachel noticed that Ross had been really quite. "Ugh" she said out loud.

This caused Ross to look up "what?" he questioned.

" Oh its nothing except, I mean I didn't mean to bring that subject up tonight" She mumbled.."…Or ever".

"No Maybe, it was a good thing" Ross said slowly.

"What!" Rachel exclaimed then composed herself "I mean, what do you mean?"

"I mean maybe we should talk about it Rach…not fight, just you know talk about everything and get it all out in the open" Ross reasoned.

"Ross, come one do you really think that's possible…I mean fighting its what we do" Rachel joked trying to lighten the moment.

Rachel wasn't even sure how she felt right now, and the last person she wanted to be talking to about her feelings was Ross, the cause of her confusion.

"Come one Rach, just talk to me its worth a shot…I mean ever since last night Ive been feelings-"

"No Don't say it" Rachel cut Ross off, she wasn't ready to be having this talk. "Im not ready for this." She then stood up and began to make her way towards her room.

"So your bailing again?" Ross yelled causing Rachel to turn around.

"Well Im not having this conversation with you right now…so if that's what you want to call it, than that's what Im doing." Rachel spat out as she went to turn around once more.

"We're not Done!" Ross said still yelling trying to make her stop.

"What are you talking about?." Rachel yelled back.

She didn't know why she was fighting this. Part of her thought it was because she was scared…is this really what she needed again…another fight with Ross…no she needed to sort her thoughts before she could do this. She wanted him so badly but yet she kept pushing him away.

"Im not finished talking to you. Now I know that I hurt you..." Ross said calming his voice down as he began to walk towards her.

"Oh, YA' THINK?" Rachel shot back. "Ross you hurt me worse than any other man has ever hurt me in my life" she said as she shook her head.

"hey! You hurt me too…if I didn't think that we were-"

She cut him off once more "Oh If you didn't think what Ross" Rachel paused and let out an aggravated laugh. "If You didn't think we were on a break? So what this is all MY FAULT again? Let me tell you something it was never my fault Ross…what you did was inexcusable."

"I thought we were through!" Ross said throwing his arms up in the air. " I would have never done that if I didn't think we were over."

"But You did" Rachel said softly just above a whisper, tears forming in her eyes.

Ross calmed down once he saw a tear slip from Rachel's eye, he walked over to her and wiped the tear away. "Im sorry. Rachel I don't know how many times I can say that for it to be enough."

"Me Neither." Rachel said in her same somber tone.

Ross looked her in the eyes…he hated seeing her like this, most of all he hated being the cause of her pain. But hadn't she caused him pain as well? Never the less Ross slowly began to wrap his arms around her- and Rachel didn't stop him. He embraced her in a comfortable hug and then began to whisper in her ear sending chills through her body.

"See this is what I want…this is who we are Rach, we fight…and then we make up, why can't- why cant we just fix this."

Rachel just stayed silent with her eyes closed letting Ross hold her in his arms. She didn't know why they couldn't fix things, just get things right for once. She wanted to though, she knew that…she just didn't know if she could ever forgive him for what he did to her…and until she knew if she could…nothing could ever happen between her and Ross.

Their moment was interrupted by a phone ringing. Rachel loosened herself from Ross' arms, and walked over to answer the phone.

"Hello…Oh Hey…Yeah Uh my Mom told me earlier….Hold on a minute." She lowered the phone from her ear and covered the receiver. "Ross, I really need to take this, so um.."

Ross looked down and nodded his head. "Yeah…Im going now" He walked over to her and gave her a small kiss on the cheek. " Im glad your feeling better…and just so you know…we're not finished talking."

Rachel's eyes followed him as he made his way out the door.

She sighed, she had never been this confused in her life…if only she could forgive him. She then lifted the phone back up.

"Hey…Yeah so um Ill meet you at Bloomingdale's, tomorrow, after work…at like 5ish?…Okay see you then….Yeah Bye"

'Great that's all I need a date with some random guy, that my mom wants me to be with." Rachel said out loud just as Monica arrived home.

"Talking to ourselves now Rach?" Monica laughed, while looking around the apartment. "Where's Ross?"

" Oh Monica your home!" Rachel said relieved. "Can we talk now?" Rachel asked talking a seat on the couch.

Monica looked at her friend concerned. "Sure Rach." She walked over and took a seat next to her. "What going on?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Okay so that's it for now, it will pick up where I left off in the next chapter, which I hope to have up by Wednesday at the latest.

Hope you enjoyed it, I tried to really play with both sides of Ross and Rachel during the fight….hope it was believable.

Read and Review Please!


	4. Getting Over Him?

Thanks everyone for reviewing esp. those who included what they liked in their reviews…it means a lot to me to hear what you liked.

Reran, I tried making the fight as realistic for the both of them as I could, so thanks for saying you liked it.

( note: In this story Rachel use to know Matthew as a teenager, being that he was her mothers friends son.)

**Chapter 4**

**Getting over him?**

"What is it Rach?" Questioned Monica who had been waiting for Rachel's news for about five minutes now.

Rachel sighed and looked down pulling an invisible piece of lint from her jeans, just looking for anything to distract her from the things she was made to face tonight. She had no idea what to do, say, or where to start.

Everything was crazy, yesterday morning everything was fine. He was Ross and she was just Rachel, hell she was busting him the other day for what he did to her with Chloe. But now...now it was different, and Rachel couldn't even began to explain what she was feeling, she didn't know.

One thing she did know was that she wanted what Ross wanted. She wanted to just be able to make up once and for all...but she couldn't do that they already had there chance and it wasn't meant to be. Or was it? Maybe Ross really had acted out of love, with the jealousy. She had considered how badly she hurt him if he really did think she wanted to break up. That was never what she wanted. She just needed time. Time to cool down., she needed it then as well as down. It was this like 'Well maybe hes right' and 'Hell Rach get a hold of yourself he slept with someone else' that plagued her mind. She had gone back and forth with these thoughts a million times.

Rachel looked down and let to a small laugh. "What is it? Everything. Its Me. It's Ross. Its the fact that I have to go out with this guy tomorrow and I don't even want to" Rachel rambled on holding her head in her hands.

"Honey slow down" Monica said while placing a hand on her friends shoulder. "Okay now what is it with you and Ross?"

"I Don't know Mon." Rachel said while playing with a ring on her finger. "I don't know and that's just it...its just that lately...since last night, after what he did for me Ive sort of been feeling these things."

"What Kinds of things Rach?" Monica asked slowly afraid that she already knew the answer. It wasn't that she didn't want Ross and Rachel together, she wanted that so badly for them. She just didn't want anyone to hurt anymore...and she feared that they would make another mistake.

"Well Im pretty sure I still have feelings for Ross." Pretty sure? She was positive but couldn't let herself admit that just yet. "Mon, let me ask you something...do you still have feelings for Richard." Rachel hated to bring it up...but she felt that maybe in some way Monica could relate.

"Uh, sometimes. Its not so much that I still love him or anything, I just- I guess I just miss what we had, and the sense of being loved" Monica replied now feeling bad for Rachel.

" God I was afraid of that." Rachel paused. "That's so not what this is. This is, longing and passion. This is the fact that I cant get my mind off of him, and what would have happened had he not slept with Chloe...I wonder how much things would be different...you know? If we would be engaged if we could be happy. I don't just miss being loved." She then quickly grabbed a pictured from the side table next to them, inside it displayed a picture of the gang together this past Christmas, with Rachel sitting on Ross' lap, and the two of them just smiling at each other. She seemed to sit there and study it for a while before finishing. " I think its that...I miss being loved by him."

Monica studied her friend who was still twisting a silver ring around her middle finger which Monica realized Ross had given her just a few months ago. If things weren't so serious right now she would make a joke asking when she was going to return it for credit...but it seemed uncalled for. She hadn't realized just how much her friend was hurting right now.

Monica spoke up in a quiet manner. " So what are you going to do now?"

"I don't know we kind of had a fight-"

"What "Monica exclaimed. "How do two people kind of fight?"

"He decided that we should talk about 'us' and me trying to get out of it because of the impending fight just made a joke out of it and I told him that I couldn't talk about it right now...but then he insisted we talk." She let out a breath " Anyway it turned into this big fight about the whole break issue, until I started to cry, and then...he came over to me, and just held me...and he told me something that just, uh, Monica it broke my heart"

"Well what did he say?"

" He said- He said that we fight and then we make up. That it was what we did...and he wanted to know why we couldn't just fix things."

"Then what happened?" Monica asked concerned

"I couldn't answer him, because honestly I don't know how we can fix things...when I cant even get past the fact that he cheated on me." Rachel wanted to fix this more than anything in the world. "Anyway then he left because Matthew called-"

"Whose Matthew?" Monica questioned

"Some guy my Mom set me up with. Im sorry I ever agreed to it. I clearly cant go out with some guy when I don't know how I feel about Ross. Maybe I should just call and cancel."

"I think you should go." Monica said flatly

"What?" Rachel asked. Had she heard correctly?

"I said I think you should go. Rachel you need to, you need to attempt to move on. Look that's the only way you could ever find out how you feel about Ross...I say you go and see this Matthew and make the best of it." The truth was Monica was hoping on the fact that Rachel would have a horrible date and realize how much Ross meant to her, and just let go of her pride and give him another chance.

"Your right Monica...I cant keep stressing over this. Ill give him a shot...he could be just what I need." Rachel said putting on a smile. "Thanks Mon."

"Well good...glad I helped...Now Im going to get to bed." Monica said while standing up.

"Wait! What about Pete? How did that go?" Rachel asked.

"Ill tell you about it some other time, we went out for Italian..." Monica said before turning into her room leaving Rachel to sit on the couch alone with her thoughts.

'Ugh this so isn't what I need' Rachel thought about Matthew. Looking down at the picture one last time she stared at her and Ross. "I need you" she said just about a whisper.

Placing it on the table in front of her she stood up and began to head towards her room. Stopping halfway she turned around again and walked back over to the table, and picked up the same picture, before walking away and carrying it into her room.

**XXX**

Rachel looked at her watch again growing more and more aggravated by the minute. Matthew had agreed to meet at six o'clock sharp…and it was now nearing six thirty.

"Cant even get here on time." Rachel said rolling her eyes…'well if he cant get here on time, than Im not going to wait for him' she thought to herself as she prepared to leave blooming dales, as she excited the doors she passed by a handsome blonde man about 6' 2".

"Not bad…" Rachel said not realizing she had spoken out loud

"Excuse me?" The man said turning around giving her a small grin.

'Well hes cute' Embarrassed "Oh…" she let out an uneasy laugh "I said Um, My bag…yeah there was this woman over there…with this same bag"

"Uh Huh" The man said slowly.

"Yeah…Um…I just get a little excited." Rachel said smiling. Good going Rach embarrass yourself in front of the cute stranger.

"Hm. You look really familiar…" the man said lifting his finger up to scratch his forehead.

"Yeah?" Rachel said while smiling.

"Wait a minute..of course, Bloomingdale's…your Rachel Green aren't you?" he questioned "Its me, Matthew"

"Oh My God! Hey!" Rachel yelled as he gave her a hug. She hadn't expected herself to be this excited to seem him after all that was going on in her mind…but the change was welcome. After all she hadn't expected him to look quiet like this.

"Wow…I mean you just look so different now." he said smiling "I mean your nos-Ill stop you just look really great" he said while placing a hand on her shoulder giving her a warm smile.

"Thanks, and you don't look so bad yourself Matt" she replied flirtatiously

They stood there smiling at each other for a while until Matt placed his arm on her lower back.

"Shall we?" He asked with a smile leading Rachel out of the store.

Well hes forward thought Rachel. "Of course" as they walked down the street for a while she looked up at him and smiled "Uh, I know Im supposed to be the one showing you around…but if you don't mind me asking…where are we going." she said with a laugh.

Matthew stopped to face her "Okay you want the truth?" He asked. Rachel just smiled and nodded looking confused. "I lied…this isn't my first time in the village."

"Its not?" Rachel asked "Then why did you need me?"

Matthew looked down and smiled "Okay listen, I only told your Mother that so I could meet you again. I always thought you were pretty cute growing up but never got to see you all that much…so then when she had mentioned that you had just gotten out of a relationship and lived in the village I took that as my chance." Matthew paused and reached out to grab her hand, Rachel went to pull away at first, but then felt more relaxed when she looked into his crystal blue eyes.

"Wow. Look Matthew, I am so unbelievably flattered…its just that your right I did just get out of a pretty serious relationship, and Im not really looking to get involved with anyone right now" Rachel replied thinking of Ross

"Look, all Im asking is that you just go out to dinner with me tonight and we could take it from there." He said giving her a grin.

With her free hand she readjusted the purse on her shoulder, after thinking for a bit she finally spoke up " Well…alright " Rachel said with a laugh. He did seem like a nice guy after all. And he was cute.

**XXX**

"Wow, I cant believe you won that case" Rachel said with the laugh. The two were now walking up the stairs to the hall where Monica and Rachel's apartment was "I mean not that I thought you were a bad lawyer…its just so…so…"

"Out there?" Matt asked with a smile while Rachel nodded. "Yeah I know, but hey you don't exactly get to pick your clients if you know what I mean."

"Yeah I could only imagine." Rachel then stopped in front of her apartment and leaned up against the door facing Matthew. "Well this is my place" she said with a small smile.

Matthew grabbed her hand and grinned back at her "Listen Rach, I had a really wonderful time with you tonight."

"Yeah me too" she replied sincerely

"Great, so you wouldn't mind if we, I don't know went out again sometime soon?" He said lifting up her hand to his mouth kissing it twice.

"Id like that a lot"

"Good." He said as he enveloped her in a hug. He looked into her eyes while placing his hand on the back of her neck while he slowly leaned into her, Rachel knew what was coming next.

Surprising herself by not pulling away she deepened the kiss by allowing him to enter her mouth, as they broke away Rachel was left breathless.; Never had she allowed herself to be kissed like that since Ross, it was a scary feeling but something in Rachel's mind told her it was right.

"Well.." Rachel said quietly clearing her throat.

"Yeah" Matthew said while stroking her shoulder "Did you mind if, I don't know, I come in?" He asked while leaning in to kiss Rachel on the top of her head.

Something about that sent chills through her spine, it was just like Ross use to do." I have to be up early for work tomorrow so-" Rachel replied trailing off.

"Yeah I understand" Matthew looked down. "So um, Ill call you later this week, alright?"

"Yeah sounds great."

"Alright, see you Rach." He said as he vanished down the stairs.

Rachel let out a deep breath as she entered the darkened apartment, she leaned up against the door and sighed. Eyeing a clock on the wall she realized how late it was, Had they really been out till' 11:30?

Rachel had surprised herself at what a good time she actually had with Matthew. With all this Ross stuff lately she really didn't think she was going to, but it turned out to be good for her.

She was started by the kitchen light turning on, glancing over she sat that Monica was standing there getting herself a glass of water.

"Hey how was the date" Monica asked setting her glass down.

"Amazing. I actually had a really great time. Yeah, we decided to go out for dinner and just talked for forever." As Rachel took off her coat, and began walking towards her room she turned around "Thanks Mon, for convincing me to move on"

Monica was left in shock in the kitchen. What had she done?

As Rachel changed and got ready for bed, she noticed the picture she had been looking at the night before. Suddenly her smile went away, as she ran her finger over the picture of her and Ross together not even a year ago. Something in her heart broke every time she looked at that picture…it was like a piece of her was missing.

Getting over Ross was going to be harder than she thought.

XX

Ah, and thus enters the complication…

Okay, so what do you think? Leave a review…I love getting them lol. Sorry no RnR interaction but Ross will be in the next chapter don't worry. As for the ending to think story, I have no idea where its going to go, what was Biology class is for- thinking of ideas for this story…so far its been working.

Next update should be up sometime this weekend…Ill be working on it this week…but these next 3 days are going to be really busy for me.


	5. Ben's picture

Thanks for the reviews everyone

Sorry this took a bit longer to get up…I was pretty busy, and it was kind of hard getting through this chapter, but I hope you all like it

.diehardRRfan- Thanks so much, and no I havent considered it but it means so much to me that you like the way Ive been writing this.

rnrlove Im glad you like it and thanks for always reviewing

TinaChaves1 I really enjoyed reading your review as well, I was a little worried about introducing Matthew to the story, but Im glad that so far I think its working out well.

XX

Chapter 5

Rachel, who was blowing on her nails to dry them, sat solely at the kitchen table. It was a quiet Saturday afternoon, and she had no where to be but to meet Matthew at six for dinner. She smiled when she though of him.

Matthew. They had been seeing each other for about two weeks now, and Rachel was enjoying every minute of it. Sure things were a little hard at first, but she was slowly getting use to things. That was just it though, the fact that they were taking it slow, which had made things a lot easier on Rachel.

These past two weeks had been a blur. Little dates to the movies, dinner, and sweet kisses goodbye, were often the custom evening for the two. This calmed Rachel down, after being in such a serious Relationship prior to Matthew. Not that she didn't think that this could turn into something, because she did…it just comforted her to know that there was no pressure. Being with Matthew was better for her all around, she wasn't depressed and stressed out anymore, it was healthy, and she had barely thought about Ross in these past two weeks.

Barely.

Still there were moments when Ross would come over late one night when she had a bad day at work, and made her forget about all of that. That was something that she didn't have with Matthew. He would sit there and try to work things out with her, and the two would be 'angry together'. With Ross it use to be different, he would try to make her feel better, and take her mind off of all that was bothering her and just think about them. They were alone in their own world when they were together.

Rachel shook her head and tried to snap out of her thoughts. Your with Matthew now. Your Happy. She told herself, all of which was true, but something still felt empty inside of her. Matthew really was a great guy anyway, he was cute, funny, sweet, and he was interested in her work.

"Hey Rach." Monica said while walking out of her room, heading towards Rachel.

Rachel smiled at her friend. Judging from Monica's cheerfulness you would never had guessed that she just broke up with her boyfriend. It was no secret that Rachel was glad to see it end, although she was happy Monica was in a relationship…she just never really saw her with Pete. She needed someone smart, and quirky like herself that she could just really spend time with and enjoy herself. Pete was too…showy.

Monica opened up a bag of chips and placed them on the table next to Rachel taking a seat. "Did Ross call" she asked casually.

"No." Rachel replied "Why was he supposed to?"

"Yeah hes bringing Ben over remember?" Monica asked excited to see her nephew.

Ben. Rachel had forgot completely about it. How could she? She was the one who asked Ross to bring him sometime wasn't she? "Ugh Dammit." Rachel spat out. Monica looked at her friend confused by her stressed outburst. "Im going out with Matthew tonight, and I really wanted to see Ben."

"Cant you cancel it?" Monica asked placing a chip from the bag into her mouth.

"No its really important to him. He wants his parents to meet me so were going over there for dinner."

Monica laughed "Meeting his parents Rach? You just better make sure you back early tonight to study for the SATS."

"Shut up Mon!" Rachel said with swatting her on the arm laughing along. "I know it is kind of highschool-ish so early on, but I like where were headed…a lot."

Monica looked down and grabbed her friends now dry hand. "So you really like him don't you?"

Rachel paused and thought, then smiled "Yeah…yeah I guess I really do. I mean I didn't think I would, but we're moving along great. Hes the first guy since Ross I have ever felt this comfortable around."

"Im happy for you Rach." Monica said while faking a smile. Truthfully she was happy for her friend…she just wished things could be different. She wished that is was Ross who still made Rachel happy like Matthew was doing now.

"Thanks" Looking up at the clock she stood up. "I should go and get changed really quick.

Minutes later there was a knock at the door, as Ross entered carrying a near two year old Ben in his arms "Hey Mon, sorry I didn't call…Ben's been just such a good boy today." he told her with a fake smile as he shook his head and mouthed no.

"Oh Im sure he was just fine." Monica said with a smile while taking Ben from Ross' arms, and carrying him over to the couch where she sat playing with him.

"you don't mind if make some coffee do you?" He yelled to Monica, as she shook her head.

"Wray Chill!" Ben yelled his new form of Rachel's name for the month as she stepped out of her bedroom causing Ross to turn around.

Rachel made an over exaggerated gasp "Hey Ben!" she said excitedly as Ben ran off the couch into her arms, causing Ross to smile.

"Wow Rach, you look- you look great." Ross had just noticed how plainly beautiful she looked. She was dressed in the same green dressed she had worn the night of his speech, with her hair down and flowing just past her shoulders. It took his breath away. He shook his head trying to erase the thought that plagued his mind right now- remembering the last words that left her mouth as the left the apartment that evening. "_Oh Yeah and Ross? Just so you know, Im going commando too." _

Rachel smiled at him. "Thanks Ross" Rachel's attention went back to Ben who was sitting on the floor next to the table coloring her a picture. "That looks really good Ben! Where did you learn to color like that?" Rachel said making a fuss, and she kneeled down on the floor next to him, careful not to mess her outfit.

Something new came into Ross' mind, as he walked over and took a seat next to his sister on the couch. "Say Rach," Getting her attention she looked up at him "What are you so dressed up for anyway"

'Here it comes' thought Rachel. "Oh…Um… Im going out with Matthew tonight, he wants to have dinner at his parents." Rachel said looking down.

"Oh Oh alright…It just I thought you wanted to spend some time with Ben not use him as a filler before you have to go and meet your new boyfriend." Ross said in a more than pissed off tone. Honestly, he didn't know if he was even right here, or was just mad because Rachel had other plans.

"I did- I do…its just Matt thinks its really important that I meet then, and tonight is the only night we're all free. Im really sorry Ross, I forgot that you were bringing him today" Rachel looked back down at Ben, and ruffled his blond hair. " I really wish I could stay."

"Yeah I bet" Ross mumbled. Monica shot him a look.

After a few minutes of tension the phone rang. Monica jumped up and raced to the kitchen to answer the phone, eager for some way to excuse herself from the two.

"Hello" she said while fixing her hair. "Yeah just a minute" She brought the phone over to Rachel and whispered "Its Matthew"

A small smile crept across Rachel's face which didn't go un-noticed by Ross. "Hey Matty" she said cheerfully into the phone.

"Matty what is that- is he five?" Ross scoffed

"Shut Up!" Monica whispered while hitting him hard on the knee.

Rachel then stood up and walked into the kitchen.

"So how are you?" asked Matthew

"Great, can't wait for dinner" she said with a smile, playing with a strand of hair.

Ross put his head down in his hands. He felt terrible.

"Well that's good, because Ill be there to pick you up soon"

Rachel looked confused and then eyed the clock on the wall. "But sweetie its only three…you're a little early don't you think?" She said with a smirk.

"Yeah I know…but my parents want to eat earlier- I hope its not a problem."

"No, its fine Ill be waiting" She said as she had then taken a seat on the floor next to Ben once again.

"Okay Bye honey, I love you"

Clearing her throat Rachel replied "Bye You too." She couldn't bring herself to saying those three words yet, let alone in front of Ross.

She hung up the phone and placed it on the table. "I guess he'll be here soon they want to eat earlier…or something…I don't know."

Ross stood up. "Ill be right back" He said while making his way towards the bathroom. Monica made a mental note to ask him how he was later after Rachel was gone, her best guess Ross was in there crying.

"I just wish I didn't have to go so soon" Rachel told Monica, while eyeing Ben.

"Yeah I know, but I mean at least you got to see him." Monica replied

"yeah" Rachel whispered.

Shortly after there was a knock on the door, in which Rachel got up to answer.

"Hey sweetie!" Rachel said as she gave Matthew a quick kiss.

Wrapping his arms around her, while kissing the top of her head he stopped Ben. "Awe and whose this" he said gesturing to him.

Rachel loosened from his grip to walk over to Ben. "This is Ben, Ross' son."

Matthew looked down "Oh, Ro- Ross's son, hes a cute kid. Say, where is-"

Ross cut him off walking over to him to shake his hand "Hey, Im Ross, You must be Matthew?" Introducing himself in the most civil way possible. Sometime between now and when Matt first arrived Ross must have reentered the living room.

"Yeah, nice to meet you Ross" Matthew said as he walked over to Rachel, and placed a protective arm around her, making her feel uncomfortable.

"So Are you ready to go honey?" Matt asked her

She smiled "Yeah just a minute, Im going to say goodbye okay?"

Matthew nodded "Alright, Ill catch us a cab." Rachel nodded her head, and Matthew leaned in to kiss her passionately. Ross just looked down and shook his head 'Rachel shouldn't be with him' he though. Rachel, taken by surprise ended the kiss first slowly backed away from him, and gave him a small smile.

"Okay, Ill be down soon."

As Matthew left the apartment Rachel felt somewhat relieved. She still wasn't comfortable with he and Ross being in the same room together. She then looked down at Ben, who was staring at her.

Kneeling down so she was on his level she put her hand on his small shoulder. "Hey Ben, Aunt Rachel's got to' go, but Ill see you again soon okay?" Rachel said kissing him on the head.

She started to stand up and just as she was about to walk away she felt something tugging on the bottom of her dress, looking down she saw that it was Ben holding on to the picture he was coloring.

"Wray-chill" Ben said handing the picture to her.

"Wow, thanks a lot Ben!" Rachel said looking at the picture. It had 3 different color blobs on it all mixed into one, a red, blue and green one.

Monica smiled it was really cute how much Ben cared about Rachel, although she couldn't help but feel slightly jealous.

Ben then pointed to each blob "Me, You, Daddy" was all he said.

Rachel's breath caught in the back of her throat "Oh Ben…" she said and she bent down and hugged him. If only it were that simple…Rachel and Ross would be together.

She turned around to face Monica and Ross and just looked down once she made eye contact with Ross. She cleared her thought and began to head towards the door. "I-I got to go" she said before leaving…obviously a little shook up by Bens picture.

Ross looked at Monica and shook his head "I cant believe she didn't stay here with Ben."

"She couldn't, I guess he had this planned all week, I know she wanted to be here though" Monica said in Rachel's defense.

Ross snapped "You know he doesn't even deserve her!"

"What?" Monica asked started by Ross' outburst.

"You saw it when he walked in, he didn't even tell her how beautiful she looked he didn't even say anything. Rachel deserves better than that. She deserves to be told how gorgeous she really is, and how much she is loved. He- He did none of that. And Now- now she's gone with him." Ross said sitting down on the couch

Monica walked over and sat next to him "Not quite " she said softly.

Ross glanced at her "What are you talking about…she's with him now Mon."

"Didn't you see how she was when Ben gave her the picture…Ross she almost broke down." Monica said while holding up Bens drawing and handing it to Ross as he studied it.

"Do you think it means anything" Ross smiled "I mean Mon, Rachel does cry a lot you know." Ross said with a laugh

"She ALWAYS Cries Ross" Monica said joining her brother laughing "I don't know I just get this vibe from her that…she's not totally happy. Rachel does put on a good show though, remember when she first had feelings for you but never admitted them until she was drunk- but that's a different story all together. Just don't give up yet Ross."

Ross shook his head "How could I give up on her, how could I ever do that? God Monica its just so hard seeing her with him…you know?"

"I know Ross I know" Monica said as she leaned over and embraced her brother in a hug.

XX

There it is once again I hope you all liked it and please Review.

Right now Im at the point where I know how I want it to end…its just getting there that's going to be tough. Im going to try and have the next chapter up by Monday, but I havent begun writing it yet.


	6. Round Two Part I

Im glad the picture went over so well, thanks a lot for the reviews on it, as Bens drawing was something I thought of at last min. and wasn't sure how well it would go over…

Vosa, about the personalities thanks a lot, Ive been trying.

And Yes DiehardRRFan older Ben was played by the twins in Big Daddy…who I think are so cute lol I was writing that and wanting to watch Big Daddy actually.

Im really glad your all enjoying it and thrilled about the reviews, it means a lot to me.

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Chapter 6

Round Two- Part I

"Lunch will be ready in 15 minutes guys" Monica said as popped her head into the boys apartment, and then quickly disappeared just as fast as she had come.

"Do you think there will be Cake with lunch?" Joey pondered out loud causing Ross and Chandler to roll their eyes . "What?" Joey asked.

They were having lunch at Monica's today for Rachel's birthday, because Matthew had a 'big evening' planned for Rachel.

"I don't know Joe." Chandler said walking over to sit on the other recliner next to Joey, leaving Ross alone at the counter. "How are you holdin' up man?" Chandler turned his attention to Ross who hadn't said much since he got there.

"I don't even know." Ross said while looking down. "I guess Im alright, as long as I don't have to be around..._him_" Ross spat out.

"And so what if you did? Would it really be that terrible?" Joey asked "Besides I run into my old girlfriends all of the time with their new boyfriends"

"Well that's because, Joe, all of Manhattan is your ex girlfriend." Chandler said in his usual sarcastic manner.

A small smile crept across Ross' face as if he wanted to laugh, only to deteriorate moments later and he thought back to Rachel " She's not just any ex girlfriend shes-shes Rachel. And he doesn't deserve her. The man is- hes scum."

"I like him" "Hes a sweet guy" Joey and Chandler said at the same time-Chandler saying the latter of the two, in which cause Ross and Joey to look at him funny.

Chandler cleared his throat and played with his shirt collar "What I meant to say was, he makes her happy, and you want her to be happy don't you?"

"Yeah" Ross said quietly.

It wasn't fair. He was supposed to be with her...Lobsters...remember? Phoebe couldn't be wrong about that...of all of the stupid things she had ever said, this was always the one that Ross had hoped- no believed to be true.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Wow Mon, this was all really great." Rachel said leaning back in her chair, as the six sat around Monica's table after just finishing up lunch. "Thanks for being here guys…I just wish that we could have gone out tonight to celebrate…its just Matthew said he had something really special planned…and Im excited!" Rachel gushed.

Monica smiled at her friend, as much as she longed for Rachel to get back with Ross…she was growing more and more use to the thought of Rachel and Matthew together…which maybe wasn't such a bad thing after all.

"Yeah of course some stupid boyfriend is much more important than us, her real friends." Ross spat out from out of no where.

All eyes went to him, and Rachel threw him a dirty look, one that held a mixture of pain and hatred.

"One, you guys do mean a lot to me, and Two what do you mean some stupid boyfriend. Ill have you know that Matthew makes me very happy." Rachel said in her defense.

"No he doesn't, I see it in your eyes, I see how you look at him, its not the same way that you looked at me." Rachel looked down and swallowed hard listening to Ross. "So what is it then? What ? Is he a good fuck, because I cant see what else youd be in for!" Ross said raising his voice. Everyone at the table gasped and was left speechless, by his last statement. Ross had lost it.

Rachel stood up and threw her napkin onto her plate and pointed to Ross "How Dare you! You had no right to just go ahead and say that...and not that its any of your business but we haven't even had sex yet!"

That statement took Ross by surprise to say the least.

Monica then stood up gesturing for the other 3 to do the same. "Hey…um…lets go and check out the new lights I put in the bathroom."

"Ohh sounds good!" Yelled Phoebe faking her excitement.

Monica headed towards the bathroom, with Phoebe and Chandler behind her, entering the bathroom she noticed Joey wasn't with them.

Peaking her head out she yelled "Joey!"

Joey groaned and joined the other 3 in the bathroom.

"Monica your ruining my fun!" Joey whined.

Monica hit him and whispered "Shh…These walls in here are incredibly thin, now shut up and listen."

"I don't know Monica…I mean-" Chandler was cut off by Monica elbowing him in the gut.

"Shhh…Its starting again!" She hushed leaning her ear against the wall.

"You know what Ross, I loved you, I was ready to give you everything I had. I wanted to move to Scarsdale with you, I-I wanted to start a family with you. I WANTED TO BE WITH YOU. "Rachel yelled.

Ross just stared at her for a few moments. She wanted to start a family? Ross closed his eyes, and pictured what his life would be like had that night with Chloe never happened. He opened them, wishing that once he did, his bad dream would go away…and he could just wake up and Rachel would be his again. "I wanted to be with you too Rachel…so much so I planned on giving you, well I wanted to give you a ring for your birthday…" Ross said looking down. Several months ago he had planned on asking Rachel to marry him on this very day.

Rachel didn't even know what to think right now. Did he mean that he was going to propose to her? "You- You were going-" Rachel stopped and then snapped "Well whose fault is that, that it never happened?"

Ross chose to ignore that question and just wanted to confess everything to Rachel. "Rachel, does all of that matter?"

"Yes" Rachel yelled. Of course it mattered…it was the one reason why the two were apart.

"Rachel I still- I think…I think I still love you." Ross paused and walked over to her grabbing her shoulders, Rachel remained motionless with her arms folded in front of her. "No, I do, I love you, this past month since you've been with Matthew, its been hell for me. I cant just forget about you. All of this just made me realize how much you mean to me Rachel. He doesn't deserve you."

"And you do?" Rachel spat. "Ross you hurt me so much."

Ross cupped his hand on her cheek, causing Rachel to flinch " I know. Look all you have to say is what you already know…that you love me too, and we …we could work things out."

Rachel stared into his eyes for a while. Here it was, and it was hard to take it all in at once Ross was standing here in front of her telling her how much he still loved her ,everything she had been waiting to hear for months but suddenly she could only think of one answer.

"No." Rachel said flatly jerking away from Ross, walking over to grab her coat from the rack " You cant fix things just like that…by telling me that you love me. Im with Matthew now and I refuse to hurt him just as you hurt me."

As much as she still felt for Ross…she couldn't just give up on Matthew, she was having a great time with him, and didn't feel any signs as to why she shouldn't be with him.

"I have to go…and…and see him." Rachel said before turning away from Ross fighting back tears.

Ross just stood there staring at the door. Had he made things worse?

Back in the bathroom Monica sat with the back of her head up against the wall shocked at what she had just heard. Phoebe was the first the speak up "Did you have any idea Ross was going to propose? "

Monica shook her heard "No…none at all" she just stared off into the distance.

"I cant believe Rachel hasn't had sex with that Matthew guy yet…I mean what's wrong with her?" Joey asked shocked.

Ignoring Joey once again Chandler sat up from his laying position in the bathtub "This must be tearing Ross apart…do you think we should go out and talk to him?" Chandler paused "Okay well not me…let me rephrase that…Mon, do you think you should talk to him?"

"He needs to figure things out by himself now…" Monica's heart broke for Ross…and oddly enough Rachel's as well. Rachel must be so confused right now, she thought. " This has to be hard on Rachel too guys."

"Yeah?" Phoebe questioned "She's out with her new boy toy…that must be really hard on her."

"Look all I know is, Ive seen Rachel around Ross recently and something- I don't know something is still there that makes me think she still loves him…" Monica said careful not to reveal all of the details she had learned that once night when she and Rachel had talked "She's probably lost right now, unsure of what do to do with her feelings."

The conversation in the bathroom went on for what seemed like hours, until it was Monica who left the bathroom first to go check on her brother.

Walking out she saw that the apartment was empty "Ross ?" She yelled.

Monica sighed. She was worried.

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This one was a little bit shorter than they have been recently but I hope you still enjoyed it.

We're nearing the end…well at least in my head lol, I think there were probably be two or three more chapters after this one, the following one picking up right after this left off…as sort of a part two.

Please Review

Next..Round Two- Part II The sign


	7. Roudn TWo Part II

Sorry this one took a little bit longer.

Thanks to those who did review though

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Chapter 7

Round Two- Part II Realizations

Ross aimlessly meandered around the illuminated night sky of new York city. He had to get out of that apartment, he couldn't face everyone after Rachel had left like that. Tonight had been a memorable night to say the least, but then again when wasn't it with her?

This was one of those nights that Ross wished he had just kept his mouth shut. But he couldn't. He knew that he couldn't...he couldn't control was he was feeling, anger, jealousy, and love all wrapped up together.

She was Rachel. She was his everything, still was, always had, been and he was convinced that she always would remain as such.

As Ross passed by a costume shop he couldn't help but smile as memories flooded back to him." Im shipping off tonight" "Well then we better make it count" Ross shook his head with a grin, they made it count alright.

He thought back to the events that happened earlier and sighed. He had no idea that Rachel actually wanted all of those things, a family, marriage he would have been more than glad to comply with them. But it would never happen now. He had lost her, forever. He had confessed his love to her, and she did nothing. Part of him almost believed that when he told her that she would take him back. He realized now how stupid he was being, it was obvious to him that she couldn't do that to..._Matthew_. "Lucky bastard"Ross mumbled to himself as he entered his apartment building. "He doesn't even realized what he has".

Rachel found herself standing outside of Matthew apartment still trying to recompose herself before she could enter.

She sighed and dried her eyes. She couldn't believe she got into yet another fight with Ross over the same stupid thing. It was like they were dating again-only without the sex, constantly fighting the same argument never wanting to see the other ones side. She didn't have that with Matthew, He didn't disagree with much of anything, and oddly enough it was something that Rachel missed, Ross fighting with her expressed a sense of passion and strong beliefs…where as with Matthew he would agree with just about anything.

Knocking on the door she calmed down a bit. She had to get past that right now and forget about it. She was sure that Matthew had an amazing evening planned for the two of them…after all it was her birthday. As Matthew opened the door she smiled at him as she felt butterflies in her stomach. He let out a bashful grin, that reminded Rachel of a little kid's and wrapped him arms around her giving her a soft kiss on the lips, breaking away but still holding Rachel he smiled" Happy Birthday Baby"

Rachel grinned back. She was happy. "Thanks Matty" she said in a playful way.

Matthew began to pull her into the room, nibbling on her neck as he did so, which drove Rachel crazy.

Matthews apartment was by far one of the most organized of any guys she had ever seen apart from Ross'. The main room was decorated in warm deep reds and browns, that really made you feel as sense of home as soon at your eye caught a look in the room.

" So your early" he whispered in between kissing her.

Kissing him back she shortly pulled away to look into his deep blue eyes "Is that a problem?" She said seductively.

Matthew gave her that boyish grin again "No, not at all I was just wondering why you were two hours early" he replied while letting out a small chuckle.

Rachel grinned "Eh, lunch was over early and I thought what better than to surprise my boyfriend?" She lied, and then licked her lips "Besides…I could think of some ways to pass the time" She said wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Really?" Matthew said in a questioning, almost asking for permission way. As let his hand slide down the back of her skirt massaging her ass.

Letting out a small moan Rachel replied "ohh yeah" She then placed her hands on the back of his head letting her fingers roam through his blonde locks, as she kissed him passionately letting her tongue collide with his.

She didn't even know what she was doing right now, but it felt right. At first she had thought that she was doing all of this just to get back at Ross in some sick way…was that how he felt with Chloe…or could it have been the fact that she hadn't had sex since her break up with him? But at this point Rachel had realized that it was much more, so much more. It actually felt right.

Matthew then glided her onto the dark red couch still never breaking the kiss, his hands now running up and down the back of her shirt. He then began sucking on her neck, as Rachel giggled, she loosened her arms from around his waist and began unbuttoning his black silk shirt, she got about halfway down the shirt as Matthew pulled away from where he was occupied. he smiled at her.

He reached for her hand "Why don't we go" He nodded his head towards his bedroom, while standing up pulling her with him.

Rachel nodded, and allowed him to lead the way into his room..

Rachel sat on the bed and looked up at Matthew who was standing in front of her, his shirt halfway undone so Rachel could see his defined chest and abdomen, which she had to admit was quite a turn on. Smiling at him and grabbing onto the ends of his shirt she cleared her throat "So, um, where were we then?"

Matthew grinned back at her and knelt down to so he was eye level with her, and pecked her lips lightly "Right about here" he said as he undid the first button on her blouse.

Rachel then took her attention back to his shirt, as she finished unbuttoning it. It was then that she really noticed for the first time just how built his was. 'good one Rach' the shallow girl inside of her mentally noted.

Once his shirt was off he pushed her down onto the bed and began to work on her own shirt, after each button was undone he kissed her chest all the way down to her belly button where he stopped, and sat her up a bit before pulling the shirt out from under her.

He stopped and just deeply stared at her for a moment as she laid there with her hair sprawled out across his black sheets only in her bra and skirt. "You really are beautiful Rach. Have I ever told you that" He said running his hand down her side.

"Not recently" Rachel said with a small smile before leaning up and kissing him softly. She laid there for a while at Matthew began to kiss little areas all over her body. He slipped his hands behind her back and unhooked her bra.

At this point Rachel grew stiff, which went unnoticed by Matthew, who began to work at her skirt. Rachel's mind was rushing processing a million different thoughts a minute. Could she go through with this? She knew that she wanted it…but somehow all of this it didn't feel right anymore, or else she wouldn't have gotten so tense. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, feeling her skirt fall off her she felt Matthews hands reach at the back of her bra again, he paused and looked her in the eyes before diving down for another kiss in which Rachel pulled away from quickly. With one hand he brushed a lock of hair that had come down on top of her face. He locked contact with her crystal blues once again and said what Rachel was hoping he would not. "I love you Rachel. So much…You know that right?"

All Rachel could do was stare at him, she couldn't manage to pull herself away from his trance, it was as if Matthew eyes were pleading her to say something back.

"I- I" Rachel mumbled. She then pushed Matthew off of her and sat up, refastening her bra.

"What" Matthew asked confused placing a hand on her thigh.

Rachel felt horrible. Like she had been leading him on all along…but she had never really realized it until tonight. "I cant do this." Rachel whispered.

"Do you need more time?" Matthew asked concerned. "Rachel, Ill wait as long as I have to."

He was so sweet. Rachel almost regretted telling him what she had to next. She didn't want to give him up. " Matthew, god I don't even know how to say this." Rachel paused and looked up at him, he want already hanging on her every word. "I don't think I could be with you anymore…"

"What did I do? Can we fix this- whatever it is?" Matthew asked softly.

Normally she would just make up some detailed story on what was wrong with her, or their relationship, but Rachel couldn't do that to Matthew. He deserved better. He needed to hear the truth. "Its nothing you did honey, and its nothing that I wanted." Rachel began playing with a ring on her finger-nervous habit. " Its just, well you know Ross. Lately Ive been having these…these feelings for him again, actually I don't think they ever went away."

Matthew looked down. This crushed Rachel, she really didn't want to break up with this guy, its was just that it wasn't fair to either one of them if Rachel kept going on pretending all was right. As much as Ross had hurt her before, it didn't change the fact that she still loved it. It was there all along and Rachel knew it, her love had never died.

Placing her hand on Matthews shoulder she asked "are you going to be okay?"

Matthew gave her a weak smile "Yeah…sure. I mean Its going to be hard- your some girl Rachel"

Rachel gave him a weak smile.

"Well you better go…its already what like 8?" Matthew said giving up.

Rachel leaned over and kissed him on the cheek before getting up. She picked up her scattered clothes around the room and quickly put them back on her body, all while Matthew laid on his bed just staring at the ceiling.

She hated that she did this to him. She walked over and stood in front of him. "Im really sorry. Look if I didn't have feeling for Ross we could have been gre-"

Matthew shook his head "Shah…please don't say that. Just promise me that if things don't work out between you and Ross, youll consider me"

Rachel nodded her head and walked towards his bedroom door. She turned around to face him one last time "Bye Matty" she whispered. She waited a minute for his reply and when he said nothing she took it as her signal to leave.

She had to find him. And explain it all.

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Okay so one more chapter left

Please Read and Review guys.

I have to have the whole Matthew thing without I fight, I think I liked him, if I had don't things differently I would have had the story run on longer so he could have been in it more lol.

Wow Im a dork.


	8. Coming Home

Thanks for the reviews guys

Im sad to see this fic come to an end. Its one I was enjoying writing.

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Chapter 8

Coming Home.

Rachel sat on the outside steps of her apartment building just thinking about the things that had occurred in the past few week. How had her life gotten so...messy? No, messy wasn't the right word...she couldn't even describe how her life was anymore. It was confusing to say the least.

She had been there for nearly an hour already and the first few droplets of rain had just begun to fall out of the sky. Normally Rachel would panic and run inside, knowing that her hair would end up being frizzy, and her clothes a mess, even if it was a little after nine she guessed. Although this time was different, there was by far too much on her mind to worry about petty things like that. She just sat unaffected by the light droplets that were now beginning to hit her.

Rachel sighed as she looked at her hands, since when had things gotten so hard. A year ago today Rachel was happy, and now- now she was far from it.

Had she done the right thing. All along the walk home from Matthews she thought of turning around. She thought that maybe she should give another chance with their relationship. He was a sweet guy after all, and he cared about her so much. It crushed her to see the look on his face when she told him it was over. But something kept her from going back to this sweet guy-

Her sweet guy. Her Ross...if he was still willing to have her. Rachel's only problem was...forgiving him. She still wasn't sure how or if she was going to do that, she wanted to though, but it was easier said that done.

Rachel chuckled to herself, for a split second she had thought of sorting out her ideas by making a list. It reminded her of when Ross made that list of reasons not to be with her, although she still thought of it being a horrible thing...it also made her realize what lengths he would go through to make things work with them, hell he climbed up a fire escape and stood in the rain after all.

It was things like that, that made Rachel think she could forgive him. Had she given up too easy on him? She never wanted to break up with him...but was it her fault he slept with Chloe anyway? If she had never called that break, than if he was telling the truth, he would have never slept with her in the first place, thinking that she had broken up with him. But still, what pained her the most was the fact that Ross would have been able to move on so soon.

She shook her and got up. She went to step onto the steps of the apartment building where she had just been sitting, but then turned around and began walking down the rain soaked streets.

XXx

Ross stared out his window just watching the rain pour down almost as if in a trance

His thoughts kept going back to Rachel. What was she doing right now? Ross checked his watch..11:30. He had thought about calling his sister to see if she had gotten home yet, but then his mind got the better of him. It was Rachel's birthday after all, they had probably just gotten back from some nice dinner, and he was probably looking to sleep with her.

"Asshole" Ross mumbled. He hated what he had become. In reality Ross knew that Matthew was a nice guy, and obviously didn't care about forcing Rachel into sex, since they hadn't don't that yet. Still knowing Rachel, and what an ass he acted like tonight, she was probably willing to do anything to get back at him.

On some levels it was much similar to when he slept with Chloe. He had felt hurt, and bad. He didn't know what to do or where to turn, so he went out with Joey and Chandler. Stupid. When he had called her, his girlfriend who he cared about she was with _him, on their night._ Ross' jealousy had gotten the worst of him yet again, and he felt they were done for sure. He couldn't believe that he thought Rachel would sleep with Mark- but he did. He didn't trust her- that was his big mistake, he had no reason not to. He got drunk and was hurting…so he slept with Chloe.

Copy Slut.

Ross shook his head. How could he ever be so stupid? "Your not married are you? Because that's okay." He should have realized right there that this was making a mistake. But he didn't he went through with it anyway, and broke Rachel's heart. It was the night that changed history.

Their history.

And nothing could ever be the same again. Rachel had told him that already hadn't she? "No. I can't, you're a totally different person to me now-Ross. It's just changed, everything. Forever."

It had changed things forever, and yes Ross was a different person. One who now realized that he was wrong. Sure it took a while for him to admit it to himself, but he had done that. Thinking of that night brought tears to his eyes, such a horrible memory to have. Now, he only wished he had a chance to tell Rachel again just how he felt, how sorry he was. To have another chance talking because after all he did tell her he wasn't don't. Didn't he? Whatever the hell that meant.

Ross heard fumbling keys at his door.

'Probably Monica' he thought, coming to check up on him…after all he hadn't been answering his calls all night.

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Rachel stood outside the door trying to jam the key into its place. She had still kept her key to his apartment after all this time. She had to see him now and tell him how she felt, she couldn't live with herself if she didn't. This time it wouldn't be a drunken mistake. From head to toe she was soaked for walking around the streets of new York. But she didn't care, for once in her life she didn't care just how she looked. This was much different- it was all about the feeling.

As soon as she opened the door her heart broke. Seeing Ross sitting there just staring out the window motionless made her ache inside. Slowly a few tears began to fall off of her already tear stricken face.

Ross sat at his kitchen table unable to move, he had heard someone walk into the room but just couldn't find the energy to turn around and see just who it was.

"Ross" He heard a faint whisper. It couldn't be her, not now…could it?

He then felt a moist hand gripping his shoulder dampening his shirt. "Ross" the voice spoke again- it was her.

Ross turned around to see her in shock. She looked beautiful right now, to say the least. Her hair was drenched and wavy from the rain, and her make up running down her face, but he didn't care. It was Rachel. Words couldn't even describe how it felt to feel for her.

"Rach?" He asked in the form of a question, almost as if making sure she was really there, even though he knew she was standing right in front of him.

Rachel nodded her head and gave him a weak smile.

"What-What are you doing here" He asked puzzled "Shouldn't you be- I thought you were out with Matthew?"

Rachel hadn't given thought to how this might sound to him "I don't know. We- I- we almost slept together."

Ross put his head down and frowned his voice turned cold and resentful. "Go" he said.

"What?" Rachel asked softly from in front how him. How could he ask her to go, she had walked all this way in the rain to tell him how she felt, she couldn't turn back now. She couldn't leave.

"Rachel, why are you telling me this?" He said aggravated turning his head away from her.

"I couldn't do it." Rachel replied softy. Getting no reply from Ross, she put her hand on his cheek and made him look at her. "Ross your not listening to me. I couldn't do it- I couldn't sleep with him. I cant do that to you." She said firmly.

Ross just looked at her confused. "Why?" He asked

Rachel couldn't help but adore how cute Ross was sometimes, he really didn't understand. She then bent down and kissed him softly on the lips in hopes that he would understand what she was trying to explain to him.

Ross looked confused but smiled a little. "So what does this mean-"

"Ross for a while now, Ive been fighting all of these…feelings for you and I just cant do it anymore" Rachel paused and Ross gave her his full attention. "I- I cant fight it. Tonight what you said, it really made me think. And I still want everything that I wanted before, it just took me getting involved with Matthew to figure it out. Look Matthew was great and all, it just I couldn't do it. I couldn't…commit…to him knowing how I feel about you now."

Rachel then reached into her small handbag, and pulled out a small folded paper. She opened it up and revealed it to be the picture Ben drew not so long ago. "Ross this- This is what I want, I want to be a family."

Ross smiled widely. His dream had come true. Was she coming back to him?

Rachel kept going "Ive been thinking about this for a while now, and I know its going to be -hard but-"

Ross replied "Yeah it will be but I know we can make it through everything and let go of the past because I L-"

Rachel put a finger to his lips. "Stop. Me first. Ross, you said that all I had to do was tell you something and it could make everything better." Rachel paused and put a loose strand of wet hair behind her ear. "Well I didn't believe that could happen then- But I, I do now." Rachel sighed and looked down "I love you Ross."

Ross smiled and stood up, kissing her passionately. Rachel felt Ross in his kiss, nothing else seemed to matter anymore. No one could ever make her feel as good as Ross them.

As the kiss broke Rachel smiled and laughed softly "I missed those lips" she said with a smile then got a bit more serious. "Honestly though Ive missed you- not missed you…missed loving you, and being loved by you"

They would be able to get through this after all. Rachel though, they were lobsters holding onto each other forever weren't they?

Ross then leaned in to hug her, kissing the top of her head he whispered "I love you to Rach…always Ive never stopped.".

Rachel smiled. She was home. In Ross' arms she would always be home.

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I really hope you liked it. Thanks to everyone who kept reviewing this fic, it really kept me going with it.

Hope your happy with it turned out.

IF you are, please review for one last time lol.


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